Lost in Tokyo and in Life

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Kobby Tran

<i>"Hello" in your host country's language:</i> ใ“ใ‚“ใซใกใฏ(Konnichiwa) <i>Home Institution (your U.S. University/College):</i> California State University Channel Islands <i>Expected graduation year:</i> 2024 <i>Destination city & country:</i> Tokyo, Japan <i>Program provider:</i> California State University International Program <i>Major/minor:</i> Liberal Studies in Education <i>Demographics:</i> Asian/Asian American, First-Generation American, First-Generation College Student, LGBTQ+ <i>Future career aspirations:</i> I aspire to become a foreign language teacher to impact student's lives in a positive manner. <i>Top 3 goals for your time abroad:</i> My top three goals would be to expand my world view through exposure of different cultures, increase my comprehension of the Japanese language, and to learn more about Japanese culture through sight seeing.

So… it has been a few days since I moved to Japan. The first day was especially rough since it was like throwing a mouse into a maze of the Japanese train stations. It’s an entirely organized maze that’s been around for decades, and as organized as it is, throwing someone into that maze will lead to a massive learning curve. Not that it’s impossible to navigate the train system, it will just take a lot of trial and error. Fortunately, a friend was on the same flight as me coincidentally and he was able to communicate in Japanese, he was truly so much help while trying to navigate the trains. I, on the other hand, with never having been to Japan and my language skills not being the best, I was really grateful to have had my and held for the first few hours after landing.

I wish I could say that the moment I landed, I felt relieved that “I was finally here”, but no one prepares you for the exhaustion that lingers after the plane lands or how rigorous the process is to even leave the airport.

After getting to my temporary share house after a nightmarish experience with the Shinjuku train station, I was able to set my stuff down and a literal weight was finally off my shoulders, a moment where I can have some peace and rest. I was exhausted, fatigued, and jet-lagged, so I showered and fell asleep immediately after.

Unfortunately, my sleep hasn’t been the best either and I have not been able to get a consecutive 8 hours of sleep.

The days following, I’ve been severely homesick since everything is so different from home, and since there was no one I was familiar with in my share house, a feeling constantly flooded me. Japan wasn’t at all how I imagined or romanticized.

During my time in the share house, I have had nothing but time to really think about my situation, and I believe that it is due to so many changes punching me in the face, that I am as homesick as I am.

Today is the start of my programs orientation, and I will have the opportunity to meet so many more people so I am truly hoping that once I am able to build a community with those students, I won’t be as homesick as I am.

To try to alleviate my homesickness, I ordered bun cha gio at a Vietnamese restaurant and it was very delicious to just sit down and enjoy a dish from my childhood, and it is the meal pictured in this journal.